Healthy Relationships - What Do They Look
15 TRAITS OF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP
© NANCY WESSON, PH.D.
- Partners can manage conflict and differences without despair or threats
- Both partners protect and nourish the relationship and make it a priority (not addicted to work for example)
- Both partners know how to be responsible for own needs and also for the care of the relationship
- Both partners feel "special" to the other. Arguments or fights do not lead to abuse or threatened break-ups
- Both partners can communicate wants, needs, feelings, and emotional issues with little or no shame
- There is unconditional love if not unconditional agreement
- The relationship feels and is nuturing, comfortable, and fun
- Both partners attend to the needs of each other willingly and lovingly.
- The sexual relationship works well and is mutually satisfying
- Both partners can and do keep agreements (maturity)
- Both partners are honest
- There is no abuse: physical, verbal, emotional (ignoring)
- Both partners have boundaries:
- Each person can say "no" to requests from partner when necessary without feeling guilty and tell their partner when something feels not right or hurts them.
- People pleasing is kept to a minimum and neither one feels they are making a "great sacrifice" to stay in the relationship. Each person is able to do their work, attend to their children, care for other aspects of their life without threatening the relationship.
- Partners can hear feedback from each other that they may be projecting old relationship fears onto the current one.
- There is commitment: exits are blocked.